Journalism by Michael Phillips | Exposing Injustice, Demanding Reform
The Department of Sandwich Security introduced a five-tier Sandwich Threat Advisory System to gauge the risk of sandwich-related incidents. Threat levels range from low (Level 1: Breadstick Beige) to severe (Level 5: Baguette Black), advising on appropriate responses and safety measures for varying sandwich types and potential conflicts with law enforcement.
Michael Phillips humorously evaluates various sandwiches as potential projectiles, ranking them by their throwing effectiveness. From the formidable baguette to the messy meatball sub, each sandwich’s characteristics, such as weight and aerodynamics, are discussed. Ultimately, it cautions against using food as a weapon while appreciating culinary creativity.
Top 10 Sandwiches Best for Projectiles When Forced to Engage in a Friendly Game of “Catch” with Federal Law Enforcement Officers Read More